I like dropping by Broadway Comedy Club unexpectedly because you never know who you’ll see there. Saturday night is usually packed so I thought it would be a good time, and I was right.
The welcoming looking marquee of Broadway Comedy Club, on West 53rd Street!
I got to see a great line-up of comics, hosted by the very funny Chris Murphy, who looks more like a rock singer than people tell me I do! Chris is very funny and commented on his appearance by saying that as he was walking in the street some guy yelled out ” Faggot”, and he was pissed off, but of all the guys on the street, he was the only one that turned around!
Chris Murphy MC’ing the show at Broadway Comedy with his long, rockstar hair!
He also commented on his Irishness and their proclivity towards the drink! He said his own father got a DUI while taking his driving test! And it was on the written part! That’s hysterical!
Next up was Dustin Chafin, who I know for a long time, and who also has a look of his own! He’s originally from Texas, and always wears a cowboy hat, but describes his look as a guy who “should be selling meth at a gay rodeo!”
Dustin Chafin, a transplant from Racism, Texas, onstage at Broadway Comedy Club!
He says he’s from a little town in Texas called “Racism.”
On dating a girl who encouraged him not to eat meat from animals, and eat salad instead, she said to him, ” If you really liked animals you’d stop eating meat”, and he said, ” if YOU really liked animals, you’d stop eating their food!”
Bill McCarty is a real pro and has been performing for a long time. I think that’s why they gave him the infamous “check spot”! It’s the hardest spot to take cause people are reviewing their checks and arguing over who ordered “gratuity” and things like that! Bill said his health insurance plan is so bad, if he gets sick, he has to find the nearest school and go see the school nurse.
Bill McCarty striking a serious pose while making people laugh at Broadway Comedy Club!
Brian Scott McFadden who I covered in a recent Blog post was also on the show and killed it as he always does. He recently came to the attention of the producers of the new “In Living Color”, who I was helping to find people to audition, for the new show, and I told them about Brian’s strength doing characters. There aren’t many comics who can do so many strong characters. Hope he gets it!
And Russ Meneve was also on the show and is a favorite of mine. You’ve seen him on Letterman and Leno. He’s very edgy and even more than he was before. He’ll say things like, ” Did you ever get a girl so turned on you can feel her nails through your ski mask?” Very edgy!
Russ Meneve who’s so relaxed onstage he can even lean on the mic stand!
On finding a condom in the street: ” Are you telling me that there’s a person so reckless that they’d have sex in the street, yet so responsible they use a condom?” That’s funny!
He told about the Asian delivery man who got stuck in an elevator for hours because he couldn’t find the “R” for “Robby”! That’s like my joke about going into a Chinese restaurant so drunk, I tried to order a sandwich. They got so confused they called the police. And all I remember is someone yelling, ” No blead! We no have blead!” ( Bread, get it??? LOL) And I was like, ” I don’t bereave you!”
What’s also cool about Broadway Comedy is that they have these big flat screen TV’s around the room so you can see the performer wherever you’re sitting.
Russ Meneve, literally star of both stage and screen,(LOL) at Broadway Comedy Club!
Russ is also a good ad-libber which is so important and a skill I’m working to improve onstage. He asked one guy in the audience what he does to get sex, and the guy said he goes out “clubbing.” And Russ said, ” By “clubbing” you mean you club women and drag them into your van?” That was really funny!
All in all a great night at Broadway Comedy on West 53rd Street in the heart of Manhattan’s Times Square area!
Comedy Central loves Amy Schumer! Come to think of it, everyone loves Amy Schumer! But she can’t call her new pilot for Comedy Central “Everybody Loves Amy” cause it’s already been done by both Ray Romano and Chris Rock!
Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV with Amy Schumer at Gotham Comedy Club! All I needed was a jaunty Captain’s hat! ( Read further to get that one!)
Amy says that if people like her, it’s because she has a “cabbage patch” look, and we played with her when we were children!
A lot of Amy’s jokes are self-deprecating and about her appearance, and audiences love that. It makes them feel better about themselves which is why many female comics always downplayed their looks over the years. Unfortunately, some of them had no looks to downplay in the first place!
The Bowery Poetry Club is a very cool spot and where Amy Schumer taped material for hew new Comedy Central pilot!
Anyway, I went down to the Bowery Poetry Club in NYC, to see Amy tape some new material for the as yet unnamed pilot she’s doing for Comedy Central. The place was packed to overflowing. They were nice enough to hold two seats for me. Unfortunately they were on someone else’s lap, but we all got along, and it was fine! (LOLOL)
Amy only gets cuter and cuter as her career rises. She says about herself: “Right now, on the hotness scale, I’m right where everybody thinks they have a shot!”
She says, ” People think I’m from the Midwest. I think I look like I milked something recently.” All her jokes seem to have a little sexual edge to them and it works great for her!
She also talks a lot about her Mom, Sandy who was there. She took me backstage to meet her, and they look very much alike. Amy did her best not to call her Mom the “C” word, but she just couldn’t help it!
Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV, having a blast backstage interviewing Amy Schumer, after the taping of material for hew new pilot on Comedy Central!
She says she doesn’t like when her Mom brags: ” I can still fit into my wedding dress.” Amy says, ” Who cares! She can still fit into a dress she wore when she was 8 months pregnant. Big deal!”
I always like to meet comic’s Mom’s, especially when they talk about them in their act. Sandy looked like she had a great sense of humor, and for a big career in comedy, you let your daughter call you the “C” word! (LOL)
When Lisa Lampanelli introduced me to HER Mom, she too said she didn’t care. And neither did her Dad who was there in the audience when she referred to him as an ” old, blind bastard!”. Wasn’t that a rapper??? Old Blind Bastard? OBD??? No???
The opening act was Kurt Metzger another comic that everyone loves, despite the fact that he looks nothing like Amy Schumer! Kurt is a wordsmith, and comes up with phrases you don’t hear too often but which are guaranteed to be funny, like when he commented on some guy in the audience sporting a “jaunty Captain’s hat”, which he deemed a real hipster look! ( Now you get the joke above! LOL )
Some words are just funny! They’re “comedy words”! Like, chances are that any joke you write with the words “divining rod” in it will get laughs!
I recently did a fun video interview with Kurt when he was on Anthony Anderson’s 3rd Anniversary Mixtape Comedy Show. You can check that out right here:
And after the taping, Amy was kind enough to spend a few minutes with me to tape a little exclusive video for Comedy Matters TV! And surprisingly enough, that’s right here:
Amy always told me she was grateful for my support and not more than a couple of months ago said to me, “Jeffrey, if I ever get my own show, … you can count on watching it from your living room!”
I know Amy’s show will be a big hit, and I can’t wait to start watching!
I ran into Brian McCarthy from National Lampoon Radio’s Interview Show recently at a party, and he reminded me of when we first met back in the 90’s.
He was kind of new in town, and said he used to see me at many parties and events with spectacular women, and always wondered who I was, but was too nervous to come over and say hello! (LOL)
Then one day he realized we had a mutual friend named Chris Walsch. Chris and I had a comedy sketch troupe that disbanded before we got to do any performances, but we were always hysterical laughing, and I wish I knew what ever happened to him. Brian asked Chris who I was and he told him to the best of his ability! (LOL)
Thankfully the ensuing years have given Brian more courage because the evening I mentioned above, he did come over to say hello, and we had so much fun reminiscing that he invited me to be a guest on his interview show. He and producer Marty Dundics do this really fun show, and I was a guest for about an hour.
Brian McCarthy, the host of National Lampoon Interview Show, showing that he has nothing in his hands, but still does magic with Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV!
Brian McCarthy, host of National Lampoon Interview Show and Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV, pointing each other out to the police, when asked “Who did it???”
You can check it out in the video below! We really had lots of fun!
I had a real treat last night. My friends from The Syndicate, and Laugh Button, Matt Kleinschmidt, Chris Elles, and Tracey Zucatti invited me to their client Robert Kelly’s podcast called “You Know What Dude?” at Gotham Comedy Club. I had even a better time than I expected.
“You Know What Dude” Poster at Gotham Comedy Club!
I first met Robert when he was doing HBO’s Tourgasm with Dane Cook, Gary Gulman, and Jay Davis, and thought he was very funny from the gitgo.
Jay Davis, Jeffrey Gurian from Comedy Matters TV, and Robert Kelly back in 2006!
“You Know What Dude” is not the kind of podcast you’d share with your parents, but then again why are you sharing any podcasts with your parents at all???
Not only did they have mics set up at a table for the podcast, they had a standing mic on the stage of Gotham’s Vintage Lounge, so people could also get up and do some stand-up first which I think is a great idea, mixing the two. Let people hear some jokes first and then the comic joins the panel.
(L-R) Robert Kelly flipping the bird, Bonnie McFarlane, Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV, and Joe DeRosa at Robert Kelly’s podcast!
The room was packed to over-capacity, (just an exaggeration in case the fire department is reading this blog post! LOL), and I wound up sitting next to Conan Smith from Denis Leary’s Apostle Entertainment, who works with both Robert Kelly and Joe DeRosa. The two of us were laughing our asses off!
Funny guy Joe DeRosa, who I happen to like very much for his distinctive delivery and sharp material opened the show and talked a lot about the age-old conundrum of whether a straight guy like himself, would rather have sex with a gorgeous female transexual who still had her male organs down below, or a female transexual, who became a bald, muscular tattooed male, but still had his female organs intact down below.
Joe DeRosa doing what he does best, … making people laugh!
I think the gorgeous female transexual was named Billy Jaye and DeRosa proclaimed that he “would happily skip into a fire to blow Billy Jaye.” That kind of solved that problem, at least for Joe, if not for the rest of the audience! (LOL)
Bonnie McFarlane is not only a funny comic but a very empowered woman. She always winds up in “pissing” contests, (not literally! LOL) with male comics who feel the need to try and “reign her in” comedically in some way. ( No pun attached to the fact that her daughter’s name is Reina. mostly cause I couldn’t think of a joke!)
Bonnie McFarlane giving it back to Robert Kelly and Joe DeRosa who are definitely enjoying it!
To Bonnie’s credit she is NEVER intimidated, but instead goes on the attack and not only holds her own, but often comes out on top, which is exactly where I picture her when she’s with her husband Rich Vos! (LOL)
You gotta be a strong powerful woman to be married to Vos! And you gotta be able to take it when it’s dished out, as it often is when she co-judges The Lottery Show at The Comic Strip.
So when the guys accused Bonnie of self-sabotage, she struck back at Kelly by saying,” Bald people love to rape. It’s the same hormone that makes your hair fall out!” She followed that up with, ” If I was getting raped by a bald guy, I’d try a lot harder to get away, than if I was getting raped by a guy with hair!” You gotta be very hip to pull of a line like that, and she totally did!
What made the show even funnier was when Bob DiBuono came out and did Rich Vos! ( Not “did” him in the Biblical sense! Vos was in Florida, supposedly performing! LOL ) He did the best impression of Rich Vos that I ever heard. I closed my eyes and could actually picture Vos in the room. Everyone said he got more laughs than Vos gets doing his own material.
In the photo below, you can actually see a facial resemblance to Vos. When a good impressionist does his best work, he actually appears like the person he’s imitating. I think it has to do with how the speech muscles have to work in order to imitate a voice perfectly, and those muscles probably have something to do with a person’s appearance.
Bob DiBuono wearing a Rich Vos facial expression! (LOL)
That may explain this photo below when Vos tries his best to smile for a photo! (LOL)
Bonnie McFarlane with her husband Rich Vos who’s doing the best he can to smile! Either that or he’s doing his impression of a man with Bell’s Palsy! (LOL)
The topper on this show was when Robert noticed Wil Sylvince in the room and invited him to join the panel. I was hoping I’d get to hear Wil imitate his Haitian uncle, and anyone who’s ever heard him knows what I mean, ” Why you, why you, why you say dat to me?” (LOLOL)
Wil Sylvince having a laugh while doing Robert Kelly’s podcast “You Know What Dude?”
When I co-produced Kevin Hart back in 2010 at Westbury, in a sold out 2800 seat fundraiser for Haiti, along with Tony Rock, Wil was the MC, and the show was phenomenal!
So was “You Know What Dude?”, and at the end people lined up to have their “You Know What Dude” posters signed by the cast, and Kelly wrote, ” Dear Jeffrey, Thanks for all you do for comedy!”, DeRosa wrote ” Jeffrey you rule”, and what Bonnie wrote is just between her and I! (LOLOL)
I can’t wait to see it again, and maybe one day be a guest on it like I was on National Lampoon Radio last week, which should be airing today!
Chris Mazzilli and Gotham are always supporting one charity or another. Now comic/actress Alyse Kenny is taking it up a notch by producing a once a month show there, the last Monday of every month called “Alyse Kenny Presents…It’s a Charity Thing!”
Funny ladies Rachel Feinstein (L) and Alyse Kenny at Alyse’s charity show at Gotham!
Each month will benefit a different charity. On the night I went down, the show was to benefit Rosie O’Donnell’s charity, Rosie’s Theater Kids.
It was a great line-up, with fun raffle prizes available to the audience, like VIP tickets to “Late Night with Jimmy Fallon”, “The View” and “The Dr. Oz Show”!
The show was hosted by Jimmy Failla, Host of Off The Meter Radio, and I always give extra credit to anyone hosting. Now that I’m doing it on a regular basis, I see how much harder it is than just getting up to do a set, so I give Jimmy props for keeping the show moving smoothly.
Jimmy Failla holding it down onstage at Gotham as the host of the show!
The show also featured comedians Rachel Feinstein, who never fails to make me laugh out loud, Nick Cobb, Matt Baetz, and Greer Barnes! And Alyse got up and did a set as well. She and the audience were thrilled when Jim Gaffigan dropped in unexpectedly and did a killer set, mostly on McDonalds.
Jim Gaffigan who dropped by to do a guest spot on Alyse Kenny’s show at Gotham!
Jim tends to use food and things relating to food as his subject. He’ll always be known for his “hot-pocket” material. This night he went into McDonald’s and their fries, specifically the loose “bonus fry” we’re always so happy to find hiding at the bottom of the bag.
He said we wouldn’t know when breakfast ended if it wasn’t for McDonalds, and he also said that eating fast food gives you a momentary pleasure, followed by intense guilt, followed by Cancer.
Jim Gaffigan killing it onstage at Gotham!
Jim just had his fourth child, so he said he’s trying to be healthy. He takes vitamins, … and puts them in a drawer!
Nick Cobb said ” you know you’re broke when you know exactly how much money you have.” He also wondered about the sexual activity known as “69”! Being 6’4″, he said it’s a short man’s game, and wondered why anyone would want to do it in the first place. He wondered, ( and I’m paraphrasing) … “Who’s that short on time, to take the two most pleasurable things in the world, and combine them? It makes more sense to do each one separately! And he’s right!
Nick Cobb, who claims to be too tall for “69”, onstage at Alyse Kenny’s charity show at Gotham!
Alyse Kenny is fairly new on the comedy scene, and is an actor on ABC’s “What Would You Do?” She is co-writing and starring in the television pilot, “Pryor Knowledge” with Richard Pryor Jr., who just happens to be an old friend of mine, and who I sponsored for membership in The Friars Club. I actually took a photo of him in front of the photo of his Dad, Richard Pryor Sr. that graces one of the upstairs rooms.
Richard Pryor Jr., Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV, and Rain Pryor at the premiere of Paul Provenza’s The Green Room in NYC!
Alyse also just appeared in Eli Shapiro’s indie flick, “Ike Interviews God.” Her clean, fun brand of comedy showcases her skewed view of growing up the daughter of a shrink and cardiologist, her inter-faith marriage and many jobs working in television including as an Emmy Award-winning producer.
Alyse Kenny onstage performing at her charity show at Gotham!
She’s a go-getter and I’m excited about her, and even more excited that I will be performing on her next show on Monday Feb. 27th, which will benefit a charity called The Cure Is Now. You can read about them at www.thecureisnow.org
Come on out and support!
You can read more about Alyse on her website at www.alysekenny.com
Gotham Comedy Club keeps the holiday season alive by always having it’s holiday party after the holidays, which is a very cool idea. Like every year, it was packed with who’s who in comedy. Chris and Steve Mazzilli the owners of Gotham, and two of the nicest guys in the biz, threw this great party, and were actually dressed very casually which is rare for them, especially Chris who’s been known to wear a suit and tie on the beach! (LOL)
Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV with Chris Mazzilli of Gotham Comedy Club at the Laugh For Sight charity event, one of the many charity events that Chris holds throughout the year!
There was a real assortment of new and established entertainers, with a live band, plenty of good food, and a dance thing downstairs where the DJ was none other than Jim David. I asked him for some hip-hop and he looked at me like I had insulted his parents! (LOL)
I managed to dance anyway, but missed my chance to dance with Marina Franklin, who was occupied dancing with someone else! Some of the people there were Jordan Rock, who came with his Mom, Rose Rock, the matriarch of the Rock comedy dynasty, featuring brothers Chris, Tony, and now young Jordan, who was just 21.
Jordan Rock with his young-looking Mom Rose, the matriarch of the Rock comedy clan, that spawned Chris, Tony, and now Jordan! And no surprise, she has a great sense of humor!
I also saw Todd Barry, Ted Alexandro, Mike Yard, Carmen Lynch, Helen Hong, or was it Herren Hong, (both of whom are moving to LA very shortly), Angelo Lozada, Dan Naturman, Kyle Grooms, Greer Barnes, Yonah Grossman who runs the open mics with Jessica Kirson, Marion Grodin, Madison Malloy, Andrew Schwartztol, Jordan Ferber, Jamie Rosen, Mike Vecchione, and so many more that it was probably a silly idea for me to try and name them since I probably left out hundreds of people I was talking to.
“Brothas” in comedy Angelo Lozada and Mike Yard jus’ chillin’ at the Gotham Comedy Holiday party!
Brothers in comedy, Todd Barry and Ted Alexandro just chilling, at the Gotham Comedy Holiday party! (Get it??? Compare this photo caption to the one above, and let me know if you get it! LOLOL )
The people from The Syndicate, Matt Kleinschmidt, Chris Elles, and Tracey Zucatti, were there too, which was very cool, since it’s always nice to meet people in person who you talk to online. The Syndicate reps some very heavy hitters.
When I left by around 10:30 to host the Monday night show at The Comic Strip, the party was still going strong! Good job Chris and Steve, … as always!!!
According to Black Planet, Mariah Carey tweeted this photo of her in hubby Nick Cannon’s hospital bed! What better nurse could he ask for???
I only had the pleasure of meeting Mariah once at a charity event at The Whitney Museum, to raise money for Operation Smile, a charity that provides poverty stricken children with facial defects like cleft lip and cleft palate, the opportunity of having corrective surgery.
Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV, with Mariah Carey at a charity event for Operation Smile, at The Whitney Museum!
So let’s keep Nick in our prayers, and hope that he has a speedy recovery. He’s one of the nicest guys in the biz and at 31 years old has lots of wonderful things to look forward to. Get well quick Nick!!!
A healthy Nick Cannon with Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV at Nick’s New Faces Show at Gotham Comedy Club.
So when Nore told me that Tracy Morgan himself, one of the funniest dudes on the planet, asked him to be his “middle” at Carolines, I knew I had to stop by and check it out! I’ve seen Carolines crowded before, but not like this. If they could have stacked tables like bunk beds, they could have filled the place twice. (Bunk tables? I wonder if that would even work? LOL)
Nore Davis facing a packed house and then some for Tracy Morgan’s show at Carolines!
I got there in time to see Nore hit the stage, and he hit it really hard! Huge laughs and the audience absolutely loved him. For a young comic, he has great stage presence. I recently also saw him perform at Russell Simmons’ new stand-up TV show, “Russell Simmons Presents The Ruckus”, which will be airing in February, with J.B. Smoove as the host, and he killed there too! It’s really something exciting to watch, when a big star gives a young comic a shot, and they do well!
Tracy Morgan doing what he does best, … making people laugh, … onstage at Carolines!
Needless to say, ( so if it’s needless to say, then why am I saying it??? LOL) Tracy gave everyone what they were looking for. An hour of hilarity of the kind that only Tracy can bring! Not necessarily the show you’d want to bring your parents to, but a show you’d definitely want to bring your friend or significant other to! They laughed from beginning to end!
Great to see Tracy back in good health again, and engaged to be married to Megan Wallover. We wish them all the best, and a lifetime of Happiness!
He’s definitely a family kind of guy and loves to talk about his kids. I think the first time I met him was back in 2002 up in Montreal at the Just For Laughs Festival.
Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV with a moustachioed Tracy Morgan back in 2002 at the Just For Laughs Festival in Montreal!
I once went to visit him on the set of 30 Rock, during an episode where he was co-starring with a horse (LOL) and we had a great talk about the importance of family and kids!
Tracy Morgan on the set of 30 Rock, back in ’07, with a guest-starring horse!
Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV with Tracy Morgan in his dressing room on the set of 30 Rock!
I was with him at the Writers Guild Awards one year –
Tracy Morgan, with Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV at the Writers Guild Awards!
And then again more recently, after he had his kidney surgery, at Anthony Anderson’s Mixtape show at Gotham, where Tracy was a surprise performer!
Tracy Morgan and Jeffrey Gurian from Comedy Matters TV at Anthony Anderson’s Mixtape Comedy Show at Gotham!
Last year I wanted to get him for the Diabetes comedy fund raiser I produced with a killer line-up at The Comic Strip. For whatever reason it didn’t work out, but there’s always this year! Are you listening Tracy!!!
Once a month, Gotham Comedy Club is the home of Anthony Anderson’s fabulous Mixtape show. He and his partner Royale Watkins put on such a fantastic show, mixing comedy and hip-hop, with a cool DJ, usually DJ Diamond, a free-style rap battle which never ceases to amaze me, how these guys can “spit” beats right on the spot, and then a musical guest. This month it was Full Force from Staten Island.
DJ Diamond on the “ones-and twos” for Anthony Anderson’s Mixtape Show at Gotham!
Some month’s Anthony’s not able to fly in but the show still rocks. Last night’s was no exception. Bow Legged Lou, and his brother Paul Anthony opened the show and introduced Royale to the packed house. Royale is a great MC, funny in his own right, and keeps things moving along well. He always makes sure to give his wife plenty of shout-outs during the show. He must be making up for a lot of past mistakes, LOL, which he alludes to constantly! I think Royale had at one time been a very bad boy! (LOLOL)
Royale Watkins onstage at Gotham warming up the crowd for his fabulous Mixtape Show!
Marshall Brandon was the first comic up and he was a real crowd pleaser. Then Tom Van Horne, or Thomas Edward Van Horne IV, ( IV means “the fourth, not that he’s on an IV, you dopes!!! LOL ) took the stage, and hit a home run. I liked when he described the difference between being single and being married. “When you’re single, you have to go out and try and convince a drunk woman who doesn’t know you to have sex with you. When you’re married, you have to try and convince a sober woman, who DOES know you, to have sex with you!” Very clever, … and very true!!!
Tom Van Horne onstage at Gotham, doing his thing at Anthony Anderson’s Mixtape Show!
Then Vanessa Hollingshead got up, and she always does well. I love when she imitates a drunk French woman, who doesn’t know she’s drunk. The audience loved it too! People love impressions. Too bad I can’t do ANY! Maybe I can do two Greek men meeting in the street, mispronouncing words as numbers ” How are you today my friend?” Five thank you, and how are you? Not too good. I feel a little six! Really you don’t look six. You look just five to me!” If you try that in a Greek accent it comes out very funny!
Mike Yard was the closing comic and he totally killed it. He told how Black people with no insurance go to the clinic and sit till someone with insurance comes in with the same symptoms. Then when they come out from seeing the doctor, they say, ” Well, what’s wrong with us? What medication did he give us?”
Mike Yard “doin’ what he do”, at Gotham, for Anthony Anderson’s Mixtape Show!
He talked about how kids these days can call in a report on their parents on 911 if they feel they’re being mistreated. In his day, with a rotary phone you could never do that. By the time the nine came around, his mother already caught it and hung up!
But when he did an impression of the first Latino President, with a heavy Latino accent, the crowd laughed so hard, they were gasping for air.
The rap battle was astonishing as always. It’s like magic. You just can’t figure out how they do it!
The comedy world is still in shock from the passing of the great Patrice O’Neal. I attended the services for Patrice yesterday at the Park Avenue Christian Church, on 85th Street and Park Avenue in New York City. I purposely did not use the word “funeral” because the program for the service was entitled “Going Home Services” for Patrice O’Neal.
Plus “funeral” is such a sad word, and as sad as it was to think of Patrice no longer being with us, the comedians who honored Patrice made it more into a “Fun-eral”! If it was possible to put the “fun” into “Funeral” they did it.
The Reverend spoke beautifully, and there were two world class singers. The first was Michael Wheeler who sang, ” I Know Who Holds Tomorrow”, and then the beautiful Antonique Smith sang ” Let It Be.” Their voices were like angels. Powerful angels! But I could almost see Patrice sneaking out, because I knew him as a humble man, (when he wasn’t on stage), and the attention, and having everything be all about him might have made him uncomfortable!
Jim Norton read the Obituary, which chronicled Patrice’s life and career, starting from when he was born in New York City and raised in Roxbury, Massachusetts, (where he led Roxbury High School to a football state championship in his senior year), to his recent first CD entitled “Mr.P”, which sadly will be released posthumously.
Patrice was a huge man in every way. At 6’5″ and 300 pounds he was a commanding presence, but not imposing when you were a friend. From the first time I met him, and told him I thought we should be roommates so we could save money and share clothing, I think he got a kick out of me! He laughed out loud at that one!
Standing side by side we couldn’t have been more different, but we were so much alike. And he knew that. And that was a Blessing to me. Patrice got me. He knew who I was, and welcomed me into his world.
Jeffrey Gurian with Patrice O’Neal at a comedy event for which Jeffrey was honored as part of Black History Month!
Whenever I saw him, I was compelled to hug him. There was just something about him, as big as he was, that just drew me to him. I can’t explain it in words, but he understood it, because when we were on the radio together and he would explain to his audience who I was, and why he had me on with him, he did it with love and affection. I told him if we ever did TV together he should walk out holding me in his arms like a baby! He laughed at that too!
(I also once told the head of the Hell’s Angels, who was about the same size as Patrice, that if anyone ever bothered him to let me know! I like doing that to really huge men. It makes them feel relaxed when they can have a good laugh!)
Many comics said he was harsh with them, or put them down in some way. I can honestly say I NEVER had that experience with Patrice. Patrice never ridiculed me, or gave me a hard time, as comics often like to do to each other. It seems to be some strange right of passage. I actually have tapes of us on air that I treasure, where Patrice said I was “amazing”, and that he was “envious” of me! I have it here, and it’s right at the beginning!
Our ideas of how to meet beautiful women couldn’t have been more opposite. I could NEVER get away with saying the things he said to women, and he could NEVER get away with saying the things I said, nor would he want to. He knew you had to be who you were. It had to come naturally from the heart! You couldn’t fake it.
That’s why to people who thought he was a misogynist, I say, you had no idea what he was about. He truly loved women. He just didn’t like what men had to go through to get them. How a woman’s power could reduce men to being such bumbling jerks!
Patrice could imitate a little girl’s voice on stage and you would see his gentle side come out. It was easy for him to expose that side of himself, because Patrice had nothing to hide. He was comfortable with who he was.
There was nothing you could say to embarrass Patrice, and there was nothing he wouldn’t say either on stage or in a personal conversation. One of my most treasured memories of Patrice is the excited phone call he made to me at 4 A.M. after one of our episodes of The Black Phillip Show on Sirius Radio. He was so happy with how it went that he wanted to call me that night, and suggest we do a show together, but he was so humble that he said he didn’t want to “assume” anything, … as if I might not want to do it! I jumped at the chance, but unfortunately it never developed. Shortly afterwards he went on the road, and like what happens with so many good ideas, it never came to fruition. Now it never will!
If you listen to it right here, you can hear the enthusiasm in his voice!
I write a lot about people in the comedy world who I’ve known over the many years I’ve been in it, and there’s a tendency when you do that to make it seem like it’s about you. How this person was to you. I wrote about ten drafts of this post trying not to do that.
I hope this post comes across as me attempting to explain how Patrice made me feel. If Patrice genuinely liked you, you felt validated. In terms of my comedy, a lot of people have no idea what I do. He took the time to find out.
In the obituary that Norton read, when he was talking about Patrice on “Tough Crowd With Colin Quinn”, he said that “many fans saw Patrice as the shows most controversial and obstinate performer, although only on the subjects of race, religion, gender, relationships, social status, and foreign policy! (LOLOLOL) Patrice was so smart. as I’ve described him before, he was not just a comedian, he was a comedy philosopher!
To some degree all comedians are comedy philosophers, giving you their world view. But Patrice was lightyears ahead in that respect. By the time he left the stage, and very often, he’d stay up there for a while, because he could pontificate, … you really felt you knew him. He made it very clear how he felt on certain subjects.
Several of Patrice’s closest friends got to give him a tribute. Robert Kelly, Wil Sylvince, Colin Quinn, Kevin Hart, and Rich Vos all spoke about the man we were there to honor.
Colin gave a heartfelt tribute, and also made us laugh, first by commenting on Robert Kelly’s opening with a fat joke about himself, and then with his stories of Patrice on Tough Crowd, how Patrice could go on for 20 minutes essentially taking over the whole show, and then say, “Sorry Colin, what do you think? After all, it’s your show!”
Robert Kelly was moved to tears during his tribute as was Kevin Hart. Wil Sylvince who had been Patrice’s roommate at one time said that Patrice spoke “Wil” and was able to translate when people didn’t understand what Wil was saying due to his speech impediment, … which I always thought was just a strong Haitian accent! (LOL)
By the time Rich Vos got up to speak, there had already been lots of laughter, which I know Patrice would have appreciated, especially when Vos told the crowd he’d be selling his CD after the service! I’m sure everyone there had a favorite Patrice story. I’m grateful that I get to give my tribute here!
Then Patrice’s beautiful stepdaughter Aymilyon got up to speak, read a prayer and talked about how “Mr. P.” which is what she called him, had added so much to her life in the seven years he was with her Mom Von. Von is Vondecarlo Brown, Patrice’s wife, and a talented singer/songwriter as well who wrote the song “Cool Ride” for Patrice’s recent one hour Comedy Central special “Elephant In The Room”. It was at that taping that Patrice brought me backstage to introduce me to his Mom, Gloria. You feel proud when someone does that.
It’s like dating someone and they decide it’s time for you to meet their parents! It’s an honor.
I got to the chapel an hour early hoping to see Von so I could express my personal condolences. I hadn’t seen her for a while, but she if anyone, knew what Patrice and I meant to each other. She was in a back room closed off for family so I just made sure I got a good seat and waited for the service to start along with everyone else. So many people came out to honor Patrice. Chris Rock was there, Dave Attell, Bill Burr, Gary Gulman, Ben Bailey, Jay Oakerson, Todd Barry, Keith Robinson, Wanda Sykes, and many more. Several people called and texted me that they were so sorry they were out of town. Macio was in Florida and Wayne Rada was very upset that his plane was delayed coming from Florida, and that he missed it. He and Patrice had a lot of history.
I was sitting on an aisle with Sherrod Small and his girlfriend Marisa. As the family procession came down the center aisle, I saw Von and was nervous to try and get her attention, because those kinds of situations can be very awkward. But as she passed me, she looked into my eyes and I threw her a kiss and touched my heart, and she got it.
After the service when everyone was leaving, I went into the back and was able to see her for a moment. We embraced, and I was able to tell her how sorry I was for her loss. She knew how much I loved Patrice, and as I tried to explain the bond we had, she said she knew, and that made me feel good. Even with his passing, it was important for me to know that Patrice felt the same way about me! And in the midst of her sadness, she did me the kindness of saying, “I was happy to see your face when I was walking down the aisle.” I can’t tell you how that made me feel. Just writing this brings tears to my eyes!
R.I.P. Patrice! You were a one-of-a-kind, and much loved!
Jeffrey Gurian in his last photo with Patrice O’Neal taken at The Comic Strip on 9/27/11!
P.S. As a sick perfectionist, more than once I asked Patrice the proper way to spell his last name, either with an apostrophe or without, and he told me whichever way I wanted was ok, which I never really understood. On the program it was spelled with an apostrophe!
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