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Thank G-d For Lisa Lampanelli! (Explanation to Follow!)

Lest my title sound a tad dramatic, let me explain! In a day when the NY Post, ( Monday March 26th, 2012, p. 5) runs a story about political correctness running wild in our city schools, which have banned mentioning references to seemingly harmless words like “wealth” “dinosaurs”, “birthdays”, and even “Halloween”, on city-issued tests, you have to be grateful that there’s someone like Lisa Lampanelli who has the courage to challenge this type of B.S.

Lisa Lampanelli entertaining the folks at Gotham Comedy Club!

You can’t even mention “swimming pools” or “computers” because kids who can’t afford those things might feel bad. Did they ever think that it might also encourage them to work hard so that someday that CAN afford those things?

They refer to it as “economic sensitivities.” This kind of so-called “correctness” sounded like a joke when they first started, and can be great fodder for comedians, but it affects our lives greatly. And NOT in a positive way!

Soon everyone will be absolutely silent. No one will be able to speak at all for fear of offending someone in some way, or possibly bringing some uncomfortable thought to mind! As long as you don’t dare offend criminals or terrorists. That is a high priority, because most criminals and terrorists are very sensitive people, and could be easily hurt by the wrong word or phrase!

One of the beautiful things about comedy is that it has the power to bring people together. People laughing at themselves first, allows them to be able to laugh at each other. It’s all in good fun. Lisa has made even the “C” word acceptable, and I’ve heard her use it to refer to her own mother, … while her mother was present! Lisa not only talks the talk she walks the walk!

Lisa Lampanelli with Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV after her killer performance at Gotham Comedy Club!

Political correctness is killing us. It divides us and makes us hyper-sensitive to almost anything people say. There’s a great saying I once read somewhere, (and I wish I remembered where! LOL) that states, “Your ego always wants you to be offended. It actually demands that you’re offended. And when you live your life that way, you’re at the mercy of every stranger that crosses your path!”

You give every person the power over you to make you feel insulted or uncomfortable. That’s too much power to give away. People can tell when something is meant as a joke or comes from hate. All you have to do is see Lisa to know that she comes from a good place. She makes fun of herself as much as she makes fun of anyone else. So when she calls an Asian guy “Ching-Ping”, or every Spanish guy “Hector”, or makes fun of the gays, who she raises money for constantly, and who love her, the audience howls with laughter because she does it with love. She comes from a good place.

We need more like her, not necessarily that everyone has to use the “C” word, but she makes people laugh at themselves and not take things so seriously. No one of us chose our race, or ethnicity, any more than we chose our genetics. It was given to us. You get what you get, and that’s it! With so much hatred in the world, we need to break down the barriers, not create more of them.

Go to any of Russell Peters’ shows and see how multi-cultural his audience is. I call him “The Messiah of Comedy” because he makes every ethnic group laugh at each other and he does it by imitating them perfectly.

When did it become an insult, or racist to imitate an accent? Accents are real. People have them. We hear them. Do we have to make believe that we don’t? Therefore, talented people who can imitate them do. I wish I could. I talk about accents in my act. Especially the Chinese accent, which to me has to be one of the most unusual and non-sexy accents in the world.

You will never hear a woman say, ” When he speaks to me in that Chinese accent, I can’t control myself!” You could live to be a thousand, and you will NEVER hear that!

Anyway, when I heard that Lisa would be making a guest appearance at Gotham Comedy Club in a fundraiser for a Manhattan school P.S. 11, I knew I had to show up. P.S. 11, also known as The William T. Harris School, is a public elementary school located in the heart of Chelsea at 320 West 21st Street, known for it’s diversity. They should probably come to Lisa to make up the test questions! (LOL)

Barry Weintraub was the MC which was a great choice since Barry is one of the best. Wali Collins killed it especially when he went into how Black people name their children. He himself once dated a girl named La-ah, which he was shocked to find out she pronounced Ladasha!

Wali Collins onstage for the benefit for P.S. 11 in Chelsea!

Aside from making appearances all over the country, Lisa is also currently being seen on NBC’s Celebrity Apprentice, where she always tells it like it is, no matter who gets in her face. She claims to have gained 2o pounds on the show, and said she’s a five o’clock shadow away from looking like Chaz Bono! Although I can tell you that Lisa looks more elegant than ever, and I know her a long time! Success does wonders for people!

She kids her husband Jimmy Cannizzaro a lot, but he has a great sense of humor and takes it like a man! She said she flew in for this gig, but couldn’t sit next to Jimmy cause she flies first class! Everyone should fly with Jimmy. You’d definitely feel safe! The man is his own private plane! (LOL)

Lisa is loved on the show as was evidenced by the fact that sitting with her and her husband Jimmy, were Donald Trump Jr. and his wife Vanessa.

Vanessa trump, Don Trump Jr., Lisa Lampanelli and her husband Jimmy!

If there was a magazine called “Perfect Gorgeous Couples” they would be on the cover. The two of them absolutely shine, in a very humble unassuming way. I was so glad to see them cause I hadn’t seen them in a while. I first met them when they were engaged, and Vanessa told me they just had their third child 5 months ago. You’d never know it to look at her. Don looked trim and tan, which I guess works well since he’s on TV every week as one of the advisors and boardroom judges on Celebrity Apprentice along with his Dad, and sister Ivanka. Brother Eric also takes part from time to time as a task advisor or boardroom judge.

Vanessa Trump, Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV, and Don Trump Jr. at Gotham Comedy Club!

Don also writes a very detailed Blog post on what went on on Celebrity Apprentice called ” In The Boardroom” on the NBC.com website. I’ve been telling him for years he should get into comedy, when I wanted to write his material for the Friars Roast of his Dad, back in 2004, which preceded the Comedy Central Roast. So when I saw him with Lisa I said, ” You see, I told you you’d eventually be involved in the comedy world, … in one way or another!” And we all had a big laugh!

I had met Don Jr. and Vanessa originally when they were Ambassadors for Operation Smile, a fantastic charity that brings plastic surgery for cleft palates and cleft lips to poor children all over the world. Don has been on the Board since 2007. I was a guest at an event they were at, we struck up an acquaintance, and have stayed in touch. I’m happy to say that he reads Comedy Matters and I’m planning to do a video interview with him and Vanessa sometime in the near future.

Comics like to follow a comic who does well, but not too well! How anyone can follow Lisa Lampanelli onstage is a miracle, because Lisa destroyed the audience, but Mike Vecchione managed to do it. He is just so funny and really one of my favorites. I often have to follow him onstage at The Comic Strip, and I say to him, ” Did you have to be THAT funny? Was it really necessary to be THAT funny? How am I supposed to follow that???”

Mike Vecchione making people laugh as usual at Gotham Comedy Club!

Mike, who says he looks like a nasty Staten Island, racial-profiling kind of cop, ( and he does) talks about his inability to work as an undercover cop. ” Well, if I LOOK like a cop, then chances are I won’t be that effective as an undercover cop.” On being tased : A taser is a weird weapon. Kind of like a mixture of a weapon and an energy drink. When you first get tased, you think you’re gonna get a lot done today, but then it hurts a lot!( Sorry Mike for the para-phrasing! LOL)

Mike’s soft low-key delivery, combined with his fantastic writing is what really makes him special. He will definitely be very big in the business!

In line with Lisa’s type of material he asked the Asian people in the crowd, “Who do you like better, Jeremy Lin, or General Tso? Both are number 17!” That is hysterical! I think it’s funny that his own people can’t say his name. They call him Jelemy Rin!

Most comics try to end on a strong joke. Every time I thought Mike was ready to end, he topped that strong joke with an even stronger joke. He’s really such a great performer, and the nicest guy!

It was an AMAZING show, which raised a lot of money for the school. I had hoped to shoot a little video with Lisa afterwards, but she had to run, so we will definitely do that soon. Jimmy said he’ll be in it too! She also has a one woman show coming up that we have to talk about as well! ( Lisa, Tweet the shit out of this Blog post! LOLOLOL )

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Internet Star Lauren Francesca Parodies Paris Hilton’s Drunk Text with Guest Appearance By Jeffrey Gurian

Lauren Francesca is an internet sensation who often plays Lady Gaga in the Key of Awesome videos that tend to get upwards of 25 million hits! Lauren and I have been working together for a while and one of our most fun projects was one that I wrote for her, creating the character of Besame Mucho, a “hot” Latina, (as if there’s any other kind! LOL) who is acknowledged by “at least two major men’s magazines” as the best kisser in the world.

Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV with internet star Lauren Francesca, as Besame Mucho on the set of “The Academy of Oral Skills!”

It’s on Funny or Die, and on a million other comedy sites:

We also did one last year for the Oscars where she parodied every movie that was up for an award, and I was in the one about The King’s Speech!

Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV sitting on Lauren Francesca re-enacting the scene from “The King’s Speech” for Lauren’s parody of The Oscars in 2011!

Now she’s doing one parodying Paris Hilton’s newest video,”Drunk Text” and if you’ll pardon the phrase, it’s “hot”!!!

Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV with internet star Lauren Francesca as Paris Hilton on the set of her new parody film “Drunk Text”!

She had new words written and she wears a long blonde wig, and it’s really funny, and you’ll be seeing it very soon! I was one of the guys in the dark glasses who sit beside her texting and not paying her much attention during the video. The other guy, my “partner in crime”, was Mark Mangold, who’s a successful music business guy.

Jeffrey Gurian and Mark Mangold as “the guys in black” who sit on either side of Lauren/Paris as the whole drunk texting thing goes down!

There was one scene where Lauren/Paris takes a cell phone snapshot up another girl’s dress and sends it to someone as if it was her.

The girl finds out and attacks Paris and pulls her hair. To save Lauren/Paris, I shoot at the girl with a futuristic ray gun!

Jeffrey Gurian with his super powerful futuristic ray gun, protecting Lauren/Paris during her Drunk Text ordeal!

The girl who was to play the part had to leave so because actors are very inventive, actor/producer Walter Masterson who works with Lauren all the time stepped up, put on a skirt, eye make-up, and wig, and pulled it off. The funniest part was he has better legs than most girls!

Hero actor/producer Walter Masterson coming to the rescue by donning women’s clothing and makeup, before the wig went on!

Lauren Francesca fitting the blonde Paris wig on actor Walter Masterson!

Lauren/Paris proceeds to get drunker and drunker until she gets thrown out of the club by the bouncer, in this case played by Joey Boots, but not before she throws up on the club floor, which was a very funny scene to shoot!

Lauren/Paris losing her cookies on the dance floor!

Lauren Francesca/Paris with Joey Boots the bouncer who’s getting ready to throw her out!

Lauren/Paris kicking and screaming as she is thrown out of the club for being too drunk!

Lauren/Paris being dragged out of the club by the bouncer!

Now that I built up the excitement and anticipation, here’s the video! It totally rocks, and I’m all over it!

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Nick Cannon Stranded in Hospital In Aspen

Black Planet reports that Nick Cannon is recuperating from mild kidney failure in a hospital in Aspen. Fortunately his wife , Mariah Carey is at his side and not leaving, even when doctors asked her to. She said that Nick was there for HER when she was hospitalized while having twins Moroccan and Monroe, so now when the situation is reversed, she’s not leaving HIM! Good girl Mariah!

She tweeted this pic from Nick’s hospital room!

According to Black Planet, Mariah Carey tweeted this photo of her in hubby Nick Cannon’s hospital bed! What better nurse could he ask for???

I only had the pleasure of meeting Mariah once at a charity event at The Whitney Museum, to raise money for Operation Smile, a charity that provides poverty stricken children with facial defects like cleft lip and cleft palate, the opportunity of having corrective surgery.

Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV, with Mariah Carey at a charity event for Operation Smile, at The Whitney Museum!

I know that Nick has a tour coming up on Jan. 12th, called the “Still Standing” Tour with Mike Epps and Nick’s new 18 year old protege Pete Davidson. It’s supposed to kick off at the San Manuel Casino in Highland, California.

So let’s keep Nick in our prayers, and hope that he has a speedy recovery. He’s one of the nicest guys in the biz and at 31 years old has lots of wonderful things to look forward to. Get well quick Nick!!!

A healthy Nick Cannon with Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV at Nick’s New Faces Show at Gotham Comedy Club.

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R.I.P. Patrice Oneal

I just got the sad news that Patrice Oneal left us last night. He’s been on my mind every day since I heard he had a stroke on Oct. 19th. Mortality is always a weird concept to try and grasp. To think that one day you’re suddenly not here anymore is a sobering thought. When it happens to someone old you kind of expect it. When it happens to someone young who you know it shakes you to the core.

Patrice Oneal at Carolines back in 2002! He looked like a baby version of himself!

Patrice had so many friends in the comedy community and I’m proud to say I was one of them. Patrice was like a comedy philosopher. I respected his intelligence. He had a well thought out philosophy. And I respected his allegiance to his style and his choice of material. He wouldn’t bend to those who asked him to change his style, or to soften things up a little bit. He had to be who he was. I used to love watching him work. He’d take the stage, sit on a stool, and just pontificate.

Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV with honored guest Patrice Oneal at a comedy workshop that Jeffrey was giving at Gotham Comedy Club!

One year I was honored as part of Black History Month for creating comedy workshops for inner city kids. It was a beautiful event at Hunter College. The workshops were held at Gotham Comedy Club and one of my honored guests was Patrice Oneal. He took the stage and held court for a while as was his style. He was only supposed to do a short set, but he was so kind, and the crowd loved him so much, he just kept on going. He even did a Q & A afterwards and posed for photos will all who asked.

When I did my book “Filthy, Funny and Totally Offensive” I knew I could count on Patrice to give me some killer jokes. I had written jokes for the Friars Roasts for many years and was asked by journalist Tripp Whetsell, to do a book on celebs favorite nasty jokes. I got 250 celebs to tell me nasty, nasty shit! Paul Provenza wrote the foreward to the book, and Patrice had one of the longest entries. I gave him a full two pages, where most comics had one joke. And I kept a bookmark on Patrice’s page so when people came to my house, I showed them Patrice’s jokes as a representation of what to expect.

He began by asking women,” How would you keep your man if you didn’t have a pu**y? Say there was a terrible train accident, and the doctor was like, ” We gotta remove your pu**y right away or you’re gonna die.” How would you keep your man past the three months of like, ” I can’t leave the bitch, cause she just lost her pu**y in a train accident!” It goes on and on and gets funnier as you go. Only Patrice knew how to pull off material like that!

He also described weird sexual techniques that he felt Black men needed to learn from White men,including “The Fishhook”, “The Blumpkin”, “The Omelet”, “The Donkey Punch”, “The Fish Eye”, “The Chicken Cutlet”, “Puff The Magic Dragon”, “The Angry Pirate”, “The Houdini”, and last but not least “The Spider Man.” It’s all in the book.

After I did my first Black Phillip Show with him, which was part of Opie and Anthony’s “Virus” he was so jazzed about how we performed together he left me this really sincere, and meaningful message on my phone at 4 A.M. I can’t tell you how much it meant to me to be respected comedically by someone like Patrice!

Patrice-Our Own Show

Patrice Oneal in “pimp-style” with Opie from Opie and Anthony backstage at Gotham Comedy Club!

Patrice Oneal, Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV, and Dante Nero at The Black Phillip Show in 2008!

He asked me to be his co-host along with Dante Nero, not only because we were funny together but because he said I was the only white man he ever met who knew all the words to “Bitch Betta Have My Money”, a hip-hop classic from AMG from back in 1992. It happened to be his theme song.

He loved when I brought “hot” girls on the show which I did each time I came on. Dante said I had magical powers and he and Patrice named me a “Level 12 Pimp”, a title I wore proudly, because they meant it with the kind of respect one guy gives another when they brag about how crazy their friend is!

(L-R) Dante Nero, Catherine Leak, Drew Boogie, Dawn Leak, Jeffrey Gurian, Carlotta Butler, and Patrice Oneal in the studio at The Black Phillip Show!

Patrice always liked when I brought beautiful girls on the show. This time I brought Jacqueline Beaulieu, my muse at the time, straight from a fashion show runway, with Patrice Oneal, me, and Dante Nero at The Black Phillip Show!

The last time I saw him was on September 27th when he came to The Comic Strip to be one of the judges on The Lottery Show. He had been asked by host Sherrod Small, and when Sherrod told him on stage how much he appreciated it, Patrice said, ” You better appreciate it motherfucker!” I’m so glad I got the chance to catch up with him, and get some video and photos with him as I always did when I saw him.

(L-R) Jordan Rock, Robert Kelly, Patrice Oneal, and Paul Mecurio judging The Lottery Show at The Comic Strip on 9/27/11!

When I heard what condition his stroke had left him in and that he was only able to blink his eyes but yet still had his consciousness, which meant he was aware of what was happening, I thought to myself, no one deserves that kind of a nightmare. This is only my opinion. I have no way of knowing. But I think that no matter how much Patrice loved his wife Von, and his Mom Gloria, and I know he loved them with all his heart, he wouldn’t let himself live in that kind of condition. Patrice did things HIS way! I could see him willing himself to leave the planet, rather than stay in that kind of helpless state.

Opening act and close Patrice friend, Harris Stanton, Vondecarlo ( Patrice’s wife), and Patrice Oneal backstage at The Skirball Center after taping a Comedy Central special!

Harris Stanton, Jeffrey Gurian, and Patrice Oneal backstage at The Skirball Center after the taping of Patrice’s Comedy Central special!

In any case, I know he knew he was loved, and I hope he knew how much he’ll be missed! I’m very, very sad right now!

R.I.P. my friend! And thank you for all of your kindnesses!!!

In honor of Patrice, Comedy Central will be re-airing his one hour special tonight, Wed. 11/30, “The Elephant In The Room” with an edited version at 8 P.M. and an unedited version at midnight.

See the previous Comedy Matters post on Patrice for more photos and video – http://wp.me/p1pHIm-Aj

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MTV Premieres New Animated Show "Good Vibes" At NY’s Comic Con

I get to see a lot of fun projects before they hit the big or small screen, but this one from MTV was really super! As part of Comic Con NYC, 2011, MTV held a screening and a panel for it’s new animated show “Good Vibes” premiering Thursday, Oct. 27th, at 10:30 P.M. The panel was moderated by none other than Gary ( Baba Booey) Dell’Abate, Howard Stern’s longtime producer.

Gary (Baba Booey) Dell’Abate, Exec. Producer of the Howard Stern Show moderating the Good Vibes panel at Comic Con 2011!

The series follows two high school surfers, Woodie, voiced by Adam Brody of The O.C., and Mondo, voiced by Josh Gad from The Book of Mormon, who live and surf in Playa del Toro, described as “a colorful Southern California beach community!”

Woody (voiced by Adam Brody) and Mondo ( voiced by Josh Gad) on their way to the beach to do a little surfing and girl watching!

Mondo is really small and overweight, and Woody is tall and skinny with a huge blonde afro, and a big “penis” nose,( description by Adam Brody!), and like any other high school guys,… and maybe any guys at all for that matter, are obsessed with sex and pretty girls.

Almost everyone from the show showed up for the panel. On the production end there was David Gordon Green the creator of the show, and Exec. Producers Mike Clements, Brad Abelson and Tom Brady, all of whom appear in the video below.

(L-R) Exec. Producer Mike Clements, Exec. Producer and Head Writer Tom Brady, and Creator/Exec. Producer David Gordon Green on the Comic Con panel for Good Vibes!

(L-R) Tom Brady, Debi Mazar, Alan Tudyk, Olivia Thirlby, Josh Gad,Adam Brody, and Brad Abelson in a Good Vibes line-up! They’re all guilty of a great performance!

On the talent side there was Josh Gad voicing the part of Mondo, Adam Brody voicing Woody, the fantastically sexy Debi Mazar voicing the role of Mondo’s super-sexy Mom Babs, Olivia Thirlby, who had previously worked with David Gordon Green in the Judd Apatow movie he directed “Pineapple Express”, and Alan Tudyk from Joss Whedon’s Emmy award-winning TV series, “Firefly”.

Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV with Debi Mazar, the sexy voice of Babs on MTV’s Good Vibes, premiering Thurs. 10/27/11 at 10:30 P.M.

Babs (Debi Mazar) in a towel being drooled over by Adam Brody’s “Woody”, which is a perfect name for him! ( Especially in this scene! LOL )

Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV with Josh (Book of Mormon) Gad, the voice of Mondo, in MTV’s new animated show “Good Vibes”!

Check it all out right here and don’t forget to watch this Thursday, Oct. 27th at 10:30 ET/PT on MTV, right after the return of Mike Judge’s Beavis and Butthead!

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Brett Ratner Receives Lifetime Achievement Award At Friars Club

Last night Brett Ratner was honored at The Friars Club during the third annual Friars Club Comedy Film Festival produced by powerhouse Exec. Director Charlie Prince, and his team some of which are Senior Programmer Susannah Gora, Social Media Director Sue Constantine, Programming Director Eric Johnson, Managing Director Jor Law, and Director of Communications, Jaime Marsanico, who did a fantastic job coordinating last night’s event.

The festival screened over 60 films over the five days that it ran and they were from an international pool of films. It was a HUGE amount of work and they are to be commended!

Brett Ratner is one of the most accomplished and respected film, and music video directors in all of Hollywood, and he’s only 42. He’s known for the Rush Hour series starring Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker, as well as The Family Man, Red Dragon, and X-Men, The Last Stand. He was also a producer on the Fox drama Prison Break and will be producing the 84th Academy Awards next year, on Feb. 26th, 2012, with co-producer Don Mischer, and with Eddie Murphy as the host. What a team that should be!

Jeffrey Gurian from Comedy Matters TV with Brett Ratner after he received his Lifetime Achievement Award from The Friars Club, during the Friars Club Comedy Film Festival!

Eddie recently received the Comedy Icon Award from Comedy Central at the First Annual Comedy Central Awards and was presented that award by Tracy Morgan!

Tracy Morgan presenting Eddie Murphy with the Comedy Icon Award at the First Annual Comedy Central Awards!

But in 1990, Brett was still a film student at NYU. How he got in is an example of his determination. He was initially rejected due to his poor grades, but he got in to see the Dean himself and after literally begging him to watch one of his films, impressed him enough that he let him in as a student.

Brett’s student film was ” What Ever Happened to Mason Reese?” It starred Rebecca Gayheart, Anthony Michael Hall, and of course Mason Reese, an actor who became famous as a child in the 1970’s for a TV commercial he did for Underwood Devil Ham that swept the country, in which he mis-pronounced the word Schmorgasbord as “Borgashmord”. People loved it and he was an instant star.

Jeffrey Gurian with Mason Reese at Mason’s birthday party! He served a Borgashmord of course!

As an aside, for anyone who’s wondering about where Mason is now, he’s right here in NYC and doing great! He currently owns two restaurants in NYC. One is Paladar, a Pan-Latino restaurant located in Manhattan’s Lower East Side, and the other is “Destination Bar and Grille” located on Avenue A in the East Village. He’s an old friend and I see him a few times a year!

Brett found himself short on funds to finish his film, so he made another spectacular life-changing choice, and sent out “plea letters” to 20 different producers in Hollywood asking for monetary assistance to finish his film. He got only one response, but that was all he needed. Of all people, Steven Spielberg, of Amblin Entertainment sent him a check for $5,000, without ever meeting him.

Brett brought that same film to the attention of Russell Simmons, who was impressed enough that he got Brett into directing music videos, for the likes of Jay-Z, Mariah Carey, and Madonna! Not bad credits for anyone’s resume! (LOL) Russell has since been a close friend and was asked to present Brett with his Lifetime Achievement Award.

Brett once said he wouldn’t attempt to direct a feature film until he had directed 100 music videos. In 1996, the director of a film called ” Money Talks”, starring Charlie Sheen and Chris Tucker, dropped out and Russell suggested Brett Ratner to take over, which he did. That launched his career and led to his multiple big-screen successes.

Russell Simmons himself is not only known as a music impresario, but also throughout the comedy world for creating Def Jam Comedy. I recently attended some tapings he did for Comedy Central that were hosted by JB Smoove, with DJ Cassidy on the ones and twos, that starred comics like Tony Rock, Capone, Tifffany Haddish, Wil Sylvince, Earthquake, Owen Smith and tons more!

Russell Simmons with Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV on the step-and-repeat for Brett Ratner, at The Friars Club!

JB Smoove host of Russell Simmons Comedy Central Stand-Up NY specials with Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV at the Edison Ballroom!

DJ Cassidy, super hot DJ for Russell Simmons’ Comedy Central special with Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV!

Russell Simmons came to present Brett Ratner with the award, and even billionaire Ron Perelman dropped by to say a few words and pay his respects to his good friend Brett.

Russell Simmons making his opening remarks before presenting the Lifetime Achievement Award to his pal Brett Ratner!

Ron Perelman paying his respects to director Brett Ratner at The Friars Club in NYC!

Everybody is anxiously awaiting Brett’s new film “Tower Heist” starring Ben Stiller, Eddie Murphy, and Matthew Broderick, which is set to open November 4th 2011, and should be a big hit!

(L-R) David Wain, Michael Ian Black, Jeffrey Gurian, and Ben Stiller at Fez, circa 2000!

The Tower Heist poster, showing the incredible cast for the film opening November 4th, 2011.

Video of this fantastic Friars Club event can be seen right here, showing not only an interview with Brett, but also with other celeb guests such as Richard Belzer, and Aisha Tyler!

Russell Simmons chatting up the gorgeous comic/actress Aisha Tyler!

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Paul Sorvino At Karen Koeningsberg’s Birthday

Karen Koeningsberg is the founder of the charity called Cherished Feet which collects shoes for indigent people all over the world. I’m proud to say she is a friend and so I immediately accepted her invite to attend her private birthday party at the prestigious Boom Boom Room in the Standard Hotel, in NYC’s ultra-hot Meatpacking District.

Jeffrey Gurian of #Comedy Matters TV, Karen Koeningsberg of Cherished Feet and actor Paul Sorvino in the Boom Boom Room celebrating Karen’s birthday!

It was a beautiful event packed with beautiful people, one of whom was blogger Megan Averbuch of Belles and Rebelles, who was so interesting and so well dressed that I felt the need to take photos of her!

Megan Averbuch writing down her information for me effortlessly, … with my big pen!

Megan Averbuch’s “hot” shoes which only served to enhance her world class legs! (LOL)

Karen Koeningsberg with her brother Manfredo at her birthday party at The Boom Boom Room!

I was also glad to see my old friend Paul Sorvino there. I hadn’t seen him in so many years, but I was glad to see that he still looked great and that his operatic voice was as strong as ever. You should have heard him belt out “Happy Birthday”, and how long he held the note!

Paul Sorvino guiding Karen Koeningsberg on how to properly cut her huge birthday cake! His eyes rolled up as he thought about how good it would taste!

It made me recall so many years ago back in the 80’s when Paul and I hung out at a place called “Columbus Cafe”, which was a phenomenon in NYC. I don’t think that ever before or since has there been such a celebrity hang-out in New York. Paul claims to have been the first to start hanging out there. It was on 69th Street and Columbus Avenue and was run by two brothers, Paulie and Charlie Herman. Paulie is now out in LA running a restaurant called Ago.

I too was a regular, and met everyone at Columbus, including Sly Stallone, Bruce Willis, Christopher Reeve, ( before his accident), David Bowie, and even Mike Tyson. Anyone who was anyone in show biz hung out there when they were in NY.

I was there the night Mike Tyson picked up Robin Givens, threw her over his shoulder and walked out of the place with her like that. Not only was I there, but he literally pushed me out of the way to get to her. I had struck up a conversation with her downstairs outside the rest rooms, not knowing who she was, and Mike came by, shouldered me out of the way, picked her up caveman style, threw her over his shoulder and walked up the steps and out of the place just like that. And it never even occurred to me even once to start a fight with him! Not even once!

Jeffrey Gurian and Paul Sorvino back in 1991 right after he did Goodfellas!

I also reminded Paul Sorvino of a story I knew he would never remember. He played the part of “Big Paul Cicero” in the Scorcese classic Goodfellas, and it’s hard to believe it came out in 1990, cause that’s 21 years ago. I remember the day like it was yesterday,because for some reason, I was supposed to call Paul that day. I had just come from seeing the film, and he was so realistic in the role that I was literally nervous to call him. I’m not kidding when I say that. It’s the truth. I was really nervous to call him. And when I told him that on the phone, he said to me, ” What are you a shmuck? I’m an actor, not a gangster!”

He told me playing that part so well affected him for the rest of his life because people really think he’s a gangster. He actually comes from a long line of noblemen from the Naples area of Italy and says his family goes back 1,000 years. He explained that he’s technically a knight from a group of knights whose job it was originally to protect the Pope. Paul looks like he could protect anyone. He’s 6’4″ and massive, but very gentle in the way he speaks and acts.

He helped Karen cut her birthday cake and sat and talked to everyone who was there. I read on Page 6 of the NY Post that he got hit by a car a couple of days later, but thank G-d wasn’t badly hurt! Not even a car can hurt Paul Sorvino!

Check out a previous post on Karen Koeningsberg at the link below:

http://wp.me/p1pHIm-35

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Patrice Oneal and Robert Kelly Guest Judges in The Lottery Show at The Comic Strip

Every Tuesday night at 10:30 at the legendary comedy club in NYC, The Comic Strip, there’s a fun, live, streaming reality type show called “The Lottery Show.” Created by club manager JR, along with owner/founder Richie Tienken, young comics try their hand at passing to perform at the club, and are judged, … very honestly I might add,… by seasoned comedians.

(L-R) Robert Kelly, Patrice Oneal, Paul Mecurio, Richie TIenken and JR judging The Lottery Show at The Comic Strip!

The Comic Strip opened on June 1, 1976 and is still going as strong as ever after 35 years. It launched the careers of people like Jerry Seinfeld,Paul Reiser, George Wallace, Larry Miller, Ray Romano, Adam Sandler, Eddie Murphy, Chris Rock and many many more!

The past few weeks has seen stars like Artie Lange, Tony Rock and Colin Quinn come in to be Lottery Show judges, and the show is quickly gaining popularity as a “hip” thing to do in the comedy world.

Jeffrey Gurian with Artie Lange backstage after a show in 2009!

Jeffrey Gurian from Comedy Matters TV with Tony Rock, the night he was a judge on The Lottery Show at The Comic Strip!

This past week the three judges were Robert Kelly from HBO’s Tourgasm with Dane Cook, Patrice Oneal, one of my favorites, and a guy who pushes the proverbial envelope today the way Lenny Bruce did way back when, and Emmy award winning national headliner Paul Mecurio! The judges change but the host stays the same, and that position is filled by VH1’s Sherrod Small who’s due to break huge any day now.

Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV with his exact look-alike Patrice Oneal, after Patrice was a judge on The Lottery Show!

Sherrod is not only hysterical, but he controls the audience in a way that few comics can. And his bit about thanking certain segments of the audience after almost every joke, is a real crowd pleaser! And Jordan Rock is keepin’ it down on the ones and twos!

Sherrod Small and his longtime muse, … the lovely Marisa!

In this week’s show, which I will be providing a video of very shortly, you will see Patrice go off the way only Patrice can do. The judges were arguing very loudly over a call on whether a certain comic was funny or not, and why, and during what almost sounded like a street fight, a show broke out!

I will always be honored by the fact that Patrice chose me to be his co-host on his Sirius radio show, “The Black Phillip Show”. A couple of them are still up on the internet. This is one of them where Patrice is absolutely fascinated by the “hot” girls I’m with!

Jeffrey Gurian from Comedy Matters TV and Patrice Oneal all the way back in 2001!

Can’t wait to finish editing the video tape of The Lottery Show so I can post it. Stay tuned for that!

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Page 6 Review-Kelly Cutrone To Replace Andre Leon-Talley as Judge on ANTM

Kelly Cutrone is a powerhouse! How do I know? Aside from the fact that I count her as a dear friend, and know her for many years, she managed to wind up on Page 6 two days in a row, about the same story. No one does that! (LOL) It’s hard enough to get on Page 6 at all, but to have two stories back to back? Only Kelly Cutrone could do that!

Jeffrey Gurian of Comedy Matters TV with Kelly Cutrone at the Barnes and Noble book signing for her hit book ” If You Have To Cry, Go Outside.”

On Tuesday, 9/27/11 the first story ran, entitled “Diva Swap” saying that ” Sources close to the catwalk competition say Vogue editor-at-large André Leon Talley will exit Tyra Banks’ hit series America’s Next Top Model, after its 17th season wraps, and Kelly Cutrone may take his place.” Cutrone’s people had no comment on that, nor did Talley’s people, nor the CW’s people. Nobody’s people were talking!

Kelly is the head of the hot fashion P.R. firm People’s Revolution, and when she arranged for me to attend the shows at Fashion Week that she was in charge of, it was very clear that she runs everything with a tight fist! Kelly doesn’t mince words when she’s on the grind! And people jump to do her bidding.

She’s had a lot of TV experience, including her run on MTV’s The Hills which led to her starring in the spinoff, ” The City”, and finally as the star of her own show on Bravo, ” Kell On Earth”, which she also Exec. Produced!

The very next day, another Page 6 item came out entitled ” Andre’s All Good” in which Andre says there are ho hard feelings about him leaving the show, that it was mutual, and that he had a fabulous time while he was on. They like to refer to Kelly as “tough-talking” which fits her TV image, but she’s always been very kind to me.

I recall my first trip out to LA many years ago. Kelly made one phone call, and got me a super room at an even better price at the Sunset Marquis hotel in Hollywood. Then when I was out there she hooked me up with lots of fun events to make me feel at home, like I was in New York!

I remember the event she created that really put her in the public eye. Many years ago, she produced a show in NYC, in an art gallery, and the show was called ” Love, Spit, Love”. It was basically naked couples in various intimate poses within an art gallery setting. Live art, if you will! And lots of people did! I remember being there as her guest and there were tons of cops, and police barricades to try and control the huge crowds that had come to try and get in.

She mentions that event as a monumental event in her career in her hit Harper One book ” If You Have To Cry, Go Outside”, which chronicles how she overcame the often difficult and challenging events in her life that led up to the success she enjoys now.

Kelly Cutrone’s hit book, ” If You Have To Cry, Go Outside” published by Harper One!”

I was at the book signing for that event, and I came away with one of the most special pieces of memorabilia in my whole long career. When Kelly signed my book she wrote: “Dearest Jeffrey,
You are a legend! I worship you!

And under that was a big Heart, and then her name “Kelly.” And if you don’t believe me, here it is!

No caption is needed! This photo speaks for itself! (LOL)

So I along with millions of other people will be watching for Kelly on ANTM, and rooting for her continued success!

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Lisa Lampanelli Videos of Her Singing Debut At The Friars Club

I’ve been a Friar for many years. So when my good friend Lisa Lampanelli informed me that she would be making her singing debut at the club I was, … needless to say, very excited. ( It may have been needless to say, but I said it anyway! )

Jeffrey Gurian of #ComedyMattersTV with Lisa Lampanelli at The Friars Club in NY!C

So I was able to get exclusive inside footage with Lisa where we discussed everything from her upcoming Broadway show, tentatively titled “Bring Back The Fat Chick”, to people feeling left out, how she got started as an insult comic, hecklers, cruelty, why I’m not the same as most other Black comics, and all kinds of interesting things.

Lisa Lampanelli on stage at The Friars Club looking rightfully proud of her great performance!

Get to see Lisa how she really is. The video is in two parts cause it’s really too good for just one!

Part 1 –

Part 2 –

Please watch and leave a comment, and send it around to your peeps! And make sure to check out the previous post with all the Lisa Lampanelli photos at this link right here!

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